Last week on the podcasts, we discussed different ways to think about the structures that we encounter in ministry, either in whole church practice (Shock Absorber) or specifically children’s ministry (Cross Formed Kidmin). In both conversations, I railed against efficiency as a Christian virtue, arguing that a passion for efficiency says more about our post-industrial world and corporate managerial priorities than the ethics of Jesus’ upside-down Kingdom.

This week is part 2 of both discussions.

As we dig into the weeds of church systems, it is essential to keep our foundation strong. Relationships are the foundation of church life. If we lose this, then we will drift back towards industrial and corporate metaphors. Ministry becomes the assembly line of faith formation, and brothers and sisters in Christ become our products: Disciples™.

How do we effectively lead our church while avoiding these pitfalls? Great question!

I pray that these conversations will help you as you consider these topics in your own ministry context.

Relational and Responsive - The Shock Absorber

Kicking off with a cultural artefact, engages and me in a discussion on the recent Met Gala and the brouhaha surrounding Sarah Paulson’s costumed protest against the financial elites. Can a multi-millionaire actress genuinely protest against the super-rich billionaires? Or does the whole thing fail the pub test, when so many are struggling with the difficult economic moment that we are in?

We then continue our conversation about church management, landing the discussion with a few real-world examples, including,

• Church management systems

• Generational differences in communication preferences

• Applying the Shock Absorber principle to new ideas

• And the wisdom of testing new ideas by building bridges to new realities (and not burning the bridge behind you).

Grounding all of this is the theological conviction that friendship is an ecclesial category and that being friends with each other, because of Jesus, is more important than getting things done.

Catch the full conversation in the links below or on your favourite podcast app.

Systems Matter - Cross Formed Kidmin

Having discussed ministry structures in our last episode, this week Hunter Williams, Ryan Coatney and I move on to the connected topic of ministry systems.

What’s the difference?

Whereas structures define the roles and responsibilities within your ministry (who does what), systems are the repeatable processes that allow you to achieve a specific outcome (how you do it).

Hunter takes us through his four buckets of children’s ministry—children, volunteers, parents, and curriculum—with each of us able to share sustainable systems from within our own ministry practice.

Along the way, we discuss,

• Check in systems

• Volunteer recruitment

• Equipping teams

• Curriculum management, and

• Parent engagement.

Ryan closes up with these words of wisdom,

If you find yourself in any manner or in any area of your ministry chasing your tail or constantly repeating the same mistakes or not being able to get out from underneath the load… it’s almost always because you don’t have a system in place…

A system is going to get you unlost and unburied so that you can do the ministry God’s called you to do.

Catch the full conversation in the link below or on your favourite podcast app.

If you’ve got a question or topic about Children’s Ministry that you’d like us to cover on the Cross Formed Kidmin podcasts, send me a DM or leave a comment below.

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Hey friends,

When I first launched The Child In God’s Church Substack, I chose to turn on the setting that puts older posts behind a paywall. The logic, at the time, seemed reasonable enough: if people want access to the back catalogue, a paid subscription is the way to get it.

However, I’ve changed my mind on that.

The full archive of everything I’ve written is now free to read and share.

The reason for the rethink is that this previous decision wasn’t serving anyone well. The writing exists to help people think more carefully about children, theology, formation, and the church. Keeping older posts locked wasn’t helping people find the articles I believe are beneficial to your ministry and the children you lead.

If you’ve been a subscriber for a while, there may be pieces in the archive you haven’t read yet. Well, now you can.

If you want to dig in, here are three of the most-read articles from the archives.

• On Rosters and Missing Church: How many weeks a year can I ask a church member to miss church to serve in the children’s ministry?

• Cultivating an Intergenerational Heart: Might the presence of children and babies be an advantage to the gathering, rather than a deficit?

• Lessons From Lego Masters: Building a Children’s Ministry Teaching Time with technical ability, storytelling and aesthetics.

For those of you who have been paying subscribers — thank you. Your support has made a real difference, and I hope you feel good about what it’s enabled.

If you’re a free subscriber and you find the writing worthwhile, I’d love for you to consider upgrading. Paid subscriptions are a vote of confidence in this project. Children’s ministry research and writing is a pretty niche space, and every paid subscriber makes it more sustainable.

In the end, my biggest hope is that these articles genuinely serve your ministry.

If you have any comments, feedback, or suggestions for future topics, please leave a comment through the link below.

In Christ,

Tim

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You would think that with my German heritage, I would be more enthusiastic about efficient systems.

Instead, I have a complicated relationship with the notion of “efficiency” as a value, especially in the church. I can certainly see the benefits. No one wants to be purposely obtuse and block efforts at effective ministry. But there’s always the nagging thought that our passion for efficiency says more about our post-industrial world and corporate managerial priorities than the ethics of Jesus’ upside-down Kingdom.

Leaving ninety-nine sheep to go and search for the lost one seems ludicrously inefficient. Who wouldn’t be happy with a 99% success rate?! What a waste of ministry time, energy and resources. Unless, of course, that one sheep matters to the Good Shepherd.

On the other hand, perhaps being efficient with our processes helps us to be slower and more intentional with people.1

I encourage you to let this tension play out in your mind as you listen along to this week’s podcasts, which are all about how we manage our systems and structures in church life and in Children’s Ministry specifically.

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Organised Messiness - Shock Absorber Podcast

, and I begin with a discussion about King Charles’s recent visit to the USA and how effectively he was able to wield soft power in front of Congress and in his toast to Donald Trump.

From there, we move on to the topic of church management and how to go about making changes in a complex and inherently relational system. That sends my brain bouncing off onto the topic of efficiency and corporate language, drawing on Andy Crouch’s concepts of relating to culture and McLuhan’s warning that the medium-is-the-message, or in this case, how the metaphor-is-the-message.

This is just the first part of the conversation. Stay tuned and subscribe for a future episode where we get more into the weeds of how Soul Revival Church goes about our own church management.

Listen to the full conversation in the links below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Fixing Your Ministry Structures

Over in the Children’s Ministry world, Ryan, Hunter and I also begin a two part episode. This week we’re tackling ministry structures like org-charts, role descriptions and how to recruit others into your Kids Ministry in order to make efficient (there’s that word again!) use of your ministry time.

Along the way, we discuss the theological principles behind multiplying your leadership team. It’s not really (or at least, not only) about delegating your ministry tasks. Rather, following the Apostle Paul’s directive in Ephesians 4, bringing others into your ministry team is allowing them to participate in the work of ministry that they have been called to do.

Check out the full conversation below or on your favourite podcasting app.

If you’ve got a question or topic about Children’s Ministry that you’d like us to cover on the Cross Formed Kidmin podcasts, send me a DM or leave a comment below.

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Last week was the launch day for a new book from Youthworks Media, Parenting in God’s Family, Volume 2. 🎉 📚 🎉

I had the opportunity to contribute a chapter to the project on (no surprises here!) ‘Intergenerational Discipleship’.

Most chapters in the book cover really important topics on key themes and concerns for Christian parents. Chapters like:

• ‘Reflections on motherhood and work’ by Harriet Connor

• ‘Neurodivergent families can’t do it all’ by Kate Morris

• ‘Grace-filled conversations about faith and culture’ by Jenn Phillips

• ‘Simple habits for mental health’ by Alexis Hudson

However, what I was asked to contribute was a chapter on why your family is not enough for your child. No matter how amazing and how Christian you are as a parent, you are not enough for your child. And this is exactly how God designed your family to be. God designed your parenting to need the intergenerational community that is the church.

Here’s a short excerpt from my chapter.

I fear that too many of our churches are, in fact, not families but rather pseudo-communities. Church is another event that we and our children attend, rather than a family to which we belong. We expect that church will provide some spiritual nourishment and pleasant chit-chat with nice-enough people. We appreciate that our children like the kids’ program most of the time and seem to get on well enough with their peers and leaders.

What we don’t expect is to be so deeply embedded in the lives of the others at our church that this congregation of brothers and sisters in Christ holds a significant claim on our time, care, attention and affection in a way that relativises the relationships that we have with members of our own household. However, by God’s good design, this is exactly what we and our children need from the church, and what the church needs from every member of our household.

You can celebrate with us by ordering your copy now from Youthworks Media.

Order your copy from Youthworks Media.

Should we celebrate Australian history, or mourn it?

Give three cheers, or don a black armband?

This is one of the questions that and I wrestle with on this week’s episode of the Shock Absorber, sparked by my recent reading of Tony Abbott’s new book, Australia - A History: How An Ancient Land Became a Great Democracy.

While I’m less interested in taking sides, I am curious about how either a celebratory or a critical retelling of history shapes our sense of identity and value formation, and why it is difficult to acknowledge the contributions of both sides of the argument.

Along the way, we discuss Christian Smith’s account of ‘critical realist personalism’ and Nassim Nicholas Taleb’s ‘antilibrary’ as ways to foster curiosity and intentionally complexify issues. Perhaps a pathway through the history wars is the Christian celebration of Easter—holding both the grief of Good Friday and the joy of Resurrection Sunday together in a way that refuses to minimise either.

Later in the episode, we discuss the worst and best practices of welcoming newcomers to church, sparked by two articles by .

Check out the full conversation in the links below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Theology + Strategy + Practice - Cross Formed Kidmin

Back in the Kidmin world, Ryan Coatney and I tackle an idea that is close to my heart: thinking theologically, strategically and practically about Children’s Ministry.

Most of us desire to have a Children’s Ministry that is theologically sound and Bible-based, and we would want good practice to flow from our theological foundations. However, what is less frequently acknowledged and discussed is the power of strategy.

Sharing from our own church traditions, Ryan and I show how making key decisions at each of these three steps can help or hinder the Children’s Ministry outcomes that you are working towards in your local church.

Check out the full conversation or your podcast app of choice.

If you’ve got a question or topic about Children’s Ministry that you’d like us to cover on the Cross Formed Kidmin podcasts, send me a DM or leave a comment below.

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I have written about the partnered responsibility between children’s ministry, the household, and the intergenerational church. However, one sphere of discipleship that I have not written about—but am personally indebted to—is the role of faith formation in a Christian school environment.

Enter David Stonestreet, principal of Shire Christian School in the southern suburbs of Sydney.

I did my entire K-12 schooling at SCS (SSCS at the time, for “Sutherland Shire Christian School”), David Mr Stonestreet was my high school music teacher, my kids are enrolled at the school, and I am currently a member of the board (so technically 1/8th of David’s boss).

But just in case you thought the conflict of interest wasn’t high enough, David was also an almost-founding member of Soul Revival Youth Community at Gymea Anglican Church in the early 1990’s. He even brought his member card #009 to prove it.

This week on The Shock Absorber podcast, David joins me, and on the couch to talk about

• the role of Christian Schooling in modern Australia,

• why so many non-Christian and unchurched families are choosing Christian education for their kids,

• the Dutch Reformed heritage of Shire Christian School,

• the particular theology and strategy behind SCS as a “covenant Christian school”,

• transcendence vs. immanence in Christian expression, and

• to reminisce about those early days of Soul Revival.

Christian schooling is not essential to raise disciples of Jesus. In fact, as I explain in the episode, Christian schools fail to be a long-term solution for faith formation in young people; they need the local church. But it is one possible sphere of discipleship that some parents may partner with. And on this topic, David is a good guide.

To hear more of David’s personal story and journey of faith, check out this episode of The Chip Lunch podcast.

Check out the full conversation in the links below or on your favourite podcasting app.

A.I. in Christian Ministry - Cross Formed Kidmin Podcast

I chucked a sickie a few weeks back, but Hunter and Ryan had a brilliant conversation with Brandon Maddick (co-founder, with Ryan of Dominion.Chat) about the benefits and cautions around using A.I. tools in our Christian ministry practice.

What tasks might be appropriate to offload to A.I.?

What are the implicit biases that we ought to be aware of in the big tech models?

What does it mean to have an explicitly Christian A.I. model like Dominion.Chat?

Check out these topics and more on this week’s episode of the Cross Formed Kidmin podcast.

If you’ve got a question or topic about Children’s Ministry that you’d like us to cover on the Cross Formed Kidmin podcasts, send me a DM or leave a comment below.

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My friend Aurelia recently returned from six months living and studying in the UK. As she shared in an episode of The Chip Lunch (Soul Revival Church’s testimony podcast), there was both an intense feeling of loneliness in being so far from home, as well as a confidence and comfort that came from knowing that God was with her, and so she was never really alone.

There was no better application to my latest sermon in our series on John’s Gospel than that.

In John 16:16, Jesus gives his disciples a riddle: ‘In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me.’

He then goes on to (obtusely) explain what is about to come—his arrest, death and resurrection—and assures his friends that despite this, they are never truly alone. Because of the victory over death and sin that Jesus the Son is about to win for them on the cross, the Holy Spirit will unite them in love to God the Father.

Friends of Jesus share in the trinitarian life of the Godhead. And therefore, citing New Testament theologian N.T. Wright, “this passage is all about the fact that Jesus’ people have instant, immediate, direct and valued access into the very presence of the living God.”

You can watch or listen to the full sermon in the links below.

This week on The Shock Absorber, found an Andrew Huberman clip that defines healthy male friendships as those that can laugh at each other’s faces, but have each other's backs. and I respond with more caution, noting the way that humour can mask unhealthy traits and even forms of aggression and abuse.

Sharing vulnerably from his own experiences, Stu then expands into a larger conversation about humour as a hegemonic tool, and we end the episode wondering about the link between humour, jokes, and the spiritual fruit of joy, and what a joyful expression of friendship may look like in New Creation.

Check out the full conversation in the link below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Children’s Ministry Formats, Part 2 - Cross Formed Kidmin

Last episode, Ryan and I discussed the strengths and weaknesses of three possible Children’s Ministry models: large group/small groups, Sunday School, and children’s church/worship.

This week, Ryan and I continue our chat and look at church integrated (“family”) worship, station and rotations, and my ministry at Soul Revival Church.

In the moment, I couldn’t think about what to actually call the Soul Revival model, but upon reflection, the best name for it is Shock Absorber Children’s Ministry. “Shock Absorber” is not only the name of the above podcast, but the model of ministry that Soul Revival Church is seeking to put into practice throughout our whole life together. It is a model shaped by intergenerationality and third place community, two topics that form the strategic foundation of our church.

Listen to the full episode in the link below or on your favourite podcasting app.

If you have a question or topic you would like Ryan, Hunter and I to discuss on Cross Formed Kidmin then leave a comment below.

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Cross Formed KidMin

This week, Ryan and I have the first of a two-part chat about possible children’s ministry formats. The question we really wanted to get to was, what possible values of children’s ministry are implicit in the different models of a Sunday children’s ministry?

There is no “right” answer. There are always competing priorities. We will have to make some trade-offs somewhere. Not to mention the fact that the New Testament writers utterly failed to give the 21st-century suburban church a directive on whether to have large group/small groups, Sunday School, or Kids Church.

However, each model does have strengths and weaknesses that are worth taking seriously as you assess and plan your own ministry.

Take a listen to the full episode in the link below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Have a question or topic you’d like us to discuss on the podcast?
Leave a comment below.

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The Shock Absorber

For the better part of the last sixty years, churches have tried to make Christianity more accessible by lowering the cultural barriers. Cleaner car parks. Better music. More polished, “seeker-sensitive” services. At one level, it made sense. But has it actually worked? And even if it did for a time, is it still the right strategy?

I wasn’t able to make the recording of this week’s Shock Absorber, but and carried on without me tracing the rise of an attractional model of church—from Donald McGavran through to Willow Creek Community Church—and explore the tension between institutional and more organic expressions of church life.

Stu explains why at Soul Revival we’ve intentionally pushed in a different direction: not trying to sit on top of the culture, but building something a bit more like a “Yellow Submarine”—a community that goes beneath the surface of everyday life, slower, deeper, and a little more countercultural.

Check out the full conversation in the links below or your favourite podcasting app.

Refer a friend

Title: How To Teach Kids Theology: Deep Truths For Growing Faith
Author: Sam Luce & Hunter Williams
Published: New Growth Press, 2025

Disclaimer: Both Sam and Hunter are friends in ministry, and you will recognise Hunter as one of my co-hosts on the Cross Formed KidMin Podcast. Regardless, I’ve done my best to offer an honest and useful review for children’s ministry leaders.

Last instalment, I reviewed Sustainable Children’s Ministry and the “simple machines” that can make the role of the Children’s Minister more effective and … well, the hint’s in the title … sustainable.

Today, I’m swinging from practical systems across to the importance of theological knowledge in the children that we lead. However, let’s not be fooled into assuming a false dichotomy between theology and practice. One of the greatest aspects of Luce and Williams’ How To Teach Kids Theology is the movement in each chapter from rich theological description through to embedded practice in the children’s ministry space.

The authors bookend the text with a concern for the lack of theological depth they discern in many children’s ministry contexts and a call for taking both kids’ spiritual development and theological engagement seriously. “The need for depth and richness of theological truths in our children’s ministries and churches has never been more necessary” (p.173).

Both Luce and Williams have worked extensively in local evangelical churches’ children’s ministry as well as parachurch organisations such as Awana. Their theological context is therefore conservative, Protestant, and evangelical. However, there is a generosity, particularly in the chapter on ‘Orthodoxy and Theological Charity’, when outlining “disputable matters” such as the mode of baptism or Calvinism vs. Arminianism. Even those from other theological traditions outside evangelicalism, who may weigh some matters differently, or nuance language to fit their context, will find that How To Teach Kids Theology encourages and equips them for the important task of … well, again, the hints in the title … teaching kids theology.

The Big Idea

Here’s one key quote that summarises the heart of the book:

“Our desire is that this book becomes a tool that instructs you and empowers you to take God’s Word seriously. Your kids will never see the beauty of Christ or the loveliness of Christian doctrine if you don’t find Christ and his teachings beautiful” (p.173).

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Key Chapters

As I mentioned above, this book is not a work of theoretical theology divorced from the messy work of ministry with children. Each chapter outlines the problem, the principle and the practice of teaching theology to kids.

Here are a couple of chapters and key quotes that I’ve found most helpful in my ministry:

Chapter 1 - Seeing The Great Lion

With the first of several references to Narnia, this chapter sets the scene by critiquing children’s ministry experiences that give a simple caricature of God, rather than seeking to expand the horizons of kids’ imagination of how great and awesome God is.

“If we want our kids to stand firm in a culture that suppresses the truth of Christianity, we need to give them a grand view of God that overwhelms their hearts and fills them with wonder. Our children’s resolve is only as strong as the God they believe in, and if the God they believe in is presented to them as nothing more than a small deity, their loyalty will follow suit.” (p.10)

Notice a theme that carries throughout the book: a child’s conceptual theology is necessarily and immediately relevant to their ongoing love for and obedience to God. More concisely, orthodoxy leads to orthopraxy.

Chapter 5 - Simplifying vs. Distilling Theology

We want to teach children the truth in ways appropriate to their age and developmental stage. Luce and Williams’ distinction between simplifying and distilling theology is one of the most helpful and lasting principles in the book. To simplify is to “remove as much complexity as possible to get down to the fewest possible parts or requirements.” To distil, on the other hand, is to “keep the essentials and remove the unnecessary things.” This may sound like a distinction without a difference. However, when it comes to teaching theology to children, it is profound.

With reference to simplifying faith, the authors write,

“We try to make it so accessible and safe that we inadvertently inoculate our kids from faith. They get just enough of God that when life hurts, our kids apply what they learned about God [but]… the simple faith they grew up in isn’t powerful enough for the deep sorrows and dark nights. They tried faith, and it didn’t work.” (p.87)

However,

“Distillation is so powerful because you are not giving your kids a faith that they will grow out of … you are giving your kids a faith to grow into. When you distill truth, you refuse to compromise the truth… When you distil truth, you create categories in the mind of your kids that they need when they get older.” (p.88)

Distilling, rather than simplifying, takes much more work, but it is worth the effort. For more on this topic, see my article below on why analogies of the trinity fail.

Chapter 6 - Orthodoxy and Theological Clarity

To our shame, evangelicals are not known in this cultural moment as being marked by charity. So it is refreshing to see Luce and Williams bring both theological clarity and theological charity together in this chapter. Christians are to be known by their love for one another (Jn. 13:35), and once again, the book helps the reader move from concept to children’s ministry practice.

“If external, historical, and biblical truth is our standard, if charity is our mode, and if love is our goal, we will be able to teach our kids not only what is true but also how to live that truth in a life marked by love for God—love which is seen by others in our love for people.” (p.115)

Nit-Picky

No book is perfect. Here are a few pernickety comments to keep in mind.

Definition of Theology

The authors borrow John Frame’s definition of theology as “the application of God’s revelation to all of life” (p.18). This is vastly different to a dictionary definition like Merriam-Webster’s “the study of religious faith, practice, and experience, especially: the study of God and of God’s relation to the world”.

What I’ve since discovered is that it has become a right of passage for systematic theologians to come up with their own bespoke definition of ‘theology’ that suits the particular spin that they want to give to their academic task. While I don’t have a problem with Frame’s definition per se (and have generally quite appreciated Frame’s theological perspective on a number of topics), it does frustrate me that there is not generally agreed upon term within the literature.

The danger of nuancing your own definition of ‘theology’ is that you can pack an awful lot of presumptions into your definition. Writing from within a Reformed perspective, it makes sense that Frame highlights “God’s revelation”. However, he prioritises “application”, as opposed to “study of” or “knowledge of”.

Like Luce and Williams, I appreciate both the democratisation, and practical nature, of this approach. It “doesn’t give the impression that a person has to be an expert or elite Christian to be a theologian” (p.18). However, I’m still left feeling like Frame has somehow cheated by included the application of Christian doctrine as a necessary part of his definition of that doctrine. If ‘theology’ is “the application of God’s revelation”, then what do we call the understanding of that revelation, or in fact, the revelation itself?

Conclusion

Pedantic comments aside, I highly recommend How To Teach Kids Theology to children’s ministers, ministry leaders and college students alike. It provides a clear outline of theological concerns and grounds them in the practice of our weekly ministry to children and families.

Thanks for reading this instalment of Growing Disciples: Book by Book. If you have suggestions for future books worth reviewing, please leave a comment below.

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What is interesting is how the fear of boring kids and teenagers sometimes produced a fun but frivolous presentation of faith; one that was paper-thin and not robust enough to stand once the rain comes down, streams rise, and winds beat against the house.

This week, the topic of forming a robust faith in young people comes up in both The Shock Absorber and Cross Formed Kidmin podcasts. Here’s a brief summary…

The Shock Absorber

This week, , , and I discuss the way language shapes intergenerational engagement.

We kick off with an insight from the book, How to Teach Kids Theology by Sam Luce and Hunter Williams (full review coming soon). Luce and Williams make the distinction between simplification and distillation. As they describe it, simplification removes complexity, but sometimes at the expense of truth. Distillation, on the other hand, keeps the essentials, removes the unnecessary, and produces a more concentrated version of the truth. When it comes to teaching kids theology, distillation gives children a faith they can grow into rather than a faith to grow out of.

Using this as a launchpad, we discuss Jim Rayburn’s catch phrase that it is a sin to bore kids with the gospel, as well as Lee Strobel’s adolescent drift into atheism due to the lack of apologetic answers he received to his questions around faith.

The common thread? Simple answers (or non-answers) to complex questions. To grow our intergenerational, ‘shock absorbing’ relationships, leaders and parents need to know how to communicate with young people in a way that honours their curiosity and responds with both cognitive and relational answers to their questions.

My takeaway: distil, don’t simplify. Listen well to young people. Give them the honour of being image bearers of God. And in the church, the honour of being actual or potential sisters and brothers in Christ.

Catch the full conversation in the links below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Cross Formed Kidmin

From communicating faith to young people to helping them share faith with each other. This week on CFK, Hunter Williams and I discuss one of my training seminars on ‘Teaching Kids to Know and Share Their Faith’.

Building out of my definition of faith as ‘knowing, loving and obeying King Jesus’, we then discuss the relevance of age and stage development and how children can share their faith in thoughts, affections, words and deeds.

Catch the full conversation in the link below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Have you got a topic of question about Children’s Ministry you would like us to discuss. Let us know in a comment below.

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As effective as this administrative system is, the shadow of systematising ministry is that I can run my ministry week as a “functional atheist”. This is “life over God”, to borrow Skye Jethani’s framework. To run our ministry like a business, with management tools and tricks, but forgetting to bring God into the picture.

There is a better way. A way that reshapes our ministry—yes, even our administrative work—as life “with” God. A way that keeps relational dynamics at the forefront: our relationship with God and our relationships with others.

Over the last two weeks on the Cross Formed Kidmin podcast, Hunter Williams and I have discussed the five P’s for improving your ministry leadership that attempt to keep the right thing the main thing. Below is the quick version, but check out the podcast episodes for the full discussion, including a side conversation on conflict management as a way of being present with your leaders.

Five P’s to Improve Your Leadership

Part 1 - Episode 117

Prayer: Yes, it’s the correct Christian answer. But the routine answer exists for a reason. It is only by bringing God into the plans and commitments you have for your week that you move from the functional atheism of life over God to a ministry leadership life with God.

Presence: The second most important relationship you have as a leader is with your volunteer leadership team, and then with those you minister to. Create space in your week to move out from behind the computer and into the real, incarnate and messy lives of those you are commissioned to minister to.

Part 2 - Episode 118

Perseverance: Church ministry can be both uniquely life giving, and uniquely wearying. Burn out is real and all too common. It is essential that we know ourselves, and proactively work in such a way that we can persevere in our ministry in season and out of season.

Protection: Perseverance will come as a direct result of how we protect our time, our calendar, our family commitments, and our own devotional lives. Scheduling time to reflect on ministry by yourself (balcony time) and with others (through supervision, mentoring, or spiritual direction), and also allowing natural rhythms to shape our year. (Top tip: you don’t have to be busy all year round!)

Planning: This is where all five P’s come together as you plan your day, week, month, season and year in such a way that you have time for prayer, presence, perseverance and protection. This is turn will draw you back to the top, as you commit your plans to God in prayer.

Have you got a topic of question about Children’s Ministry you would like us to discuss. Let us know in a comment below.

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Last week, we read the first half of John 15 (vv.1-17) and looked at Jesus’ words of ‘remaining’, or ‘abiding’. The text for today (John 15:18-16:4) is part two of Jesus’ speech, where he now tackles the question: What does a life abiding in Christ look like?

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing… If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.”

John 15:5,7

Just like a branch remaining in the vine in order to live, to be nourished, to bear fruit, so must we remain in Jesus in order to spiritually live, be spiritually nourished and to bear the fruit that Jesus calls us to bear. As we read further along with Jesus’ teachings, the discussion turns to what this abiding life looks like. What ought we as disciples of Jesus expect this life to be like?

Let me share with you Jemal’s story from Open Doors. (Lightly edited)

This is Jemal (not his real name for security reasons). Jemal and his wife, Fatima, were Muslims in Ethiopia who became Christians as young parents, enduring the customary rejection of family and neighbours. But they were part of a strong faith community, and Jemal pursued peace with Muslims around him. He became a successful man through his steel manufacturing and woodwork businesses. Life was stable and secure.

“We had a very good life,” he says heavily. “My whole family and I go to church and worship God on Sundays and Wednesdays.”

Then, visiting Muslim clerics gathered in local mosques to target them. “[The clerics] began by isolating us,” Jemal remembers. “They told the community not to talk to us. For six months, they did their work in secret.”

The silent treatment escalated to boycotting Christian businesses, then erupted into a night and day of mob violence.

“By Tuesday, they even tried to kill me,” he says, still in disbelief. “In just one hour, they destroyed everything I owned and had built up over the years. In a single day, they turned everything to ash.”

Over 215 Christian homes were destroyed, and 375 families—including Jemal’s—went on the run. Their goal, he explains, was simple: “to eliminate Christianity.”

Jemal fights back tears as he relives the moment his pregnant daughter went into labour during the chaos. At the hospital, no doctor would treat her.

“The doctors refused because she was a Christian,” Jemal says, wiping tears away. “One doctor finally felt sorry for her and gave her her own head covering to disguise her. Then she gave birth. I was so stressed that I might lose her.”

During the chaos, Jemal and his wife had also been separated from their other children.

“My greatest fear was that they would kill my children,” he says. “I was overwhelmed and paralysed. Still, the feeling of that moment remains with me.”

What does a life abiding in Christ look like for Jemal and his family? It looks like social isolation, a destroyed business, and a doctor’s refusal to provide necessary medical aid to his daughter. It looks like fleeing for your life, fear that muslim clerics may kill you and your children, it looks like fear and a sense of paralysis.

It is this kind of abiding life that Jesus is preparing his disciples for in John 15-16. Notice the words that he uses:

‘If the world hates you…’
‘That is why the world hates you…’
‘If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also.’

John 15:18-20

‘They will put you out of the synagogue; in fact, the time is coming when anyone who kills you will think they are offering a service to God.’

John 16:2

What does a life abiding in Christ look like? In a word: Persecution.

Here’s how Open Doors defines persecution:

According to Open Doors,

• Over 388 million Christians now face high to extreme levels of persecution and discrimination for their faith.

• 1 in 7 Christians worldwide, 1 in 5 Christians in Africa, 2 in 5 Christians in Asia, and 1 in 12 Christians in Latin America.

• The leading trends in Christian persecution have a common denominator of violence.

Open Doors uses 9 categories to talk about persecution, noting that in many countries more than one of these may be in effect at any one time:

• Islamic Oppression – Any violent or non-violent action used to bring countries, communities, and households under Islamic control. (e.g., Somalia & Pakistan)

• Religious Nationalism – Using the country’s majority religion to imply that Christians do not qualify as citizens. (e.g., India & Myanmar)

• Clan Oppression – Instances where a clan or extended family ensures the ongoing practice of traditional values or belief systems by force. (e.g., Afghanistan & Laos)

• Ethno-Religious Hostility – When one ethnic group subjects another to hostility based on their religion. (e.g., Sudan & Nigeria)

• Christian Denominational Protectionism – Making one Christian denomination the only legitimate expression of Christianity in the country. (e.g., Eritrea & Ethiopia)

• Communist and Post-Communist Oppression – To monitor and control Christians and churches through a system based on communist values. (e.g., China & North Korea)

• Secular Intolerance – To eradicate Christian expression from public life and impose atheistic secularism. (e.g., Uzbekistan & Cuba)

• Dictatorial Paranoia – Persecution derived from an authoritarian government that does everything to maintain power, including tearing down organised groups like Christians. (e.g., Eritrea & Nicaragua)

• Organised Corruption & Crime – Gangs and criminal groups create a climate of anarchy and corruption for selfish gain. Christians will often speak out against them and become targets for persecution. (e.g., Mexico & Colombia)

For hundreds of millions of Christians around the globe, THIS is what a life abiding in Christ looks like.

New Testament scholar and former Bishop of North Sydney, Dr Paul Barnett, puts it like this: “The vine grows in a harsh landscape.”1 This is the connecting thread between last week and this week. Abide in the vine, but be prepared, because the landscape—the garden—that the vine currently inhabits is a harsh landscape.

That’s today’s sermon in a nutshell. Let’s dig in deeper with three basic questions:

1. WHY might Jesus’ disciples expect hardship, hatred and persecution?

2. WHAT might be the persecution we could expect in 2026 in Sydney?

3. SO WHAT? How might we respond to the persecution we face?

WHY?

Here’s what Jesus says,

‘If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.’

John 15:18-19

Jesus continues to contrast between himself and “the world” that John has been emphasising since the beginning of his Gospel.

The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world. He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognise him. He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.

John 1:9-12

Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.

John 3:18-19

Years ago, I heard a preacher speak about the difference between Christmas beetles and cockroaches. Christmas beetles are attracted to the light. They love the light. They spend all summer tapping against your windows and get caught in the flyscreen because they are desperately trying to get to the light. Cockroaches, on the other hand, hate the light. If you flick a light on in your kitchen in the middle of the night and there are cockroaches about, they scatter. Back under the fridge, back inside the cupboard. They hate the light. They flee from the light. They’d rather be anywhere, as long as it’s dark and away from the light.

This is the distinction that Jesus is making. That some are attracted to him, flock to him, cling to him, have nowhere else to go other than to him (Jn. 6:68). And others refuse to come to him, reject him, flee from him and find anywhere else to be other than with him.

But there is another important thread to weave in here, and that is, you become like that which you belong to. Like a stick of celery placed in a cup of coloured water, you will take on the colour, the flavour, the values, the beliefs, and the patterns and practices of the communities that you spend time in. It’s like a marinade. You will taste like, smell like, behave like, that which you abide in.

Sociologists have several theories and sub-theories about this. But a significant one is called Reference Group Theory. This is the idea that we don’t simply have values and then find a group; we often find a group and gradually acquire the values. Another sub-theory is called Normative Social Influence, which describes the pressure — often unspoken — to conform to group norms in order to be accepted and avoid social exclusion.

Don’t worry about the names (unless you like nerding out on sociology like me). Here’s the key point, both from the Scriptures and from our study of how social systems work: You become like that which you belong to or which you aspire to belong to. The social environment does far more shaping than most of us are comfortable admitting.

If you need a pop-culture example, take my favourite chick-flick, Sweet Home Alabama. An Alabama girl has moved to New York City. Upon returning home, the difference between who she was and who she has become raises eyebrows. She has become like New York City. And the change that has been made in her appearance, her accent, her attitudes and her friendships makes her obnoxious to her old group of friends and family.

Once again, here’s what Jesus says,

‘If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own.
As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.’
John 15:19

If we belong to the world, we will behave like the world, take on the values and belief systems of the world. We’ll begin to smell like the world, taste like the world, and value the values of the world.

But, brothers and sisters, you have been chosen out of the world. We don’t belong to the world. We belong to Jesus. And so as we abide in Jesus, we will not only take on all the flavour of Jesus, not only act more like Jesus and behave more like Jesus, but this will increasingly look, sound, taste and smell more and more different from the world.

And this is WHY we might find that the world hates us.

Because if the world hates the light, if the world hates Jesus, if the world is in love with darkness and flees from the light, is scared by the light, and threatened by the light, then the more you look, sound, taste and smell like the light, the more friction you will find between you and the world.

Why might Christians find themselves living a persecuted life? Because the more the Christian resembles Jesus, the more friction will exist between the values, lifestyle, beliefs and practices of the Christian compared to the world.

“They will treat you this way because of my name.”

John 15:21

WHAT?

Next question: WHAT kind of persecuted life ought we to expect?

We started with Jemal’s story and the statistics around what persecution looks like in the majority world. But what about here in 21st-century Sydney? What kind of persecution ought we to expect?

And to answer that, I want to jump back to what we talked about at the end of last year when we looked at 1 Peter.

I preached a whole sermon back in October, asking this question: “What do you expect the Christian life to be like between here and eternity?” I’m not going to re-preach the whole sermon. If you want to read it, you can find it here:

But here’s the quick version.

At the time of the Bible, and still today in many of the countries where there is strong opposition to, persecution of, and hatred towards Christians and Christianity, there was little overlap between the ethics and belief systems of Christianity compared to the Empire.

But, through the spread of Christianity in Europe, the overlap between Christianity and “the West” increased, so that for a long time in the West, the definition of a “good Christian” and a “good Australian” had a high degree of overlap. Never completely aligned, but there was a strong commonality between the virtues, beliefs, ethics and practices of both categories.

However, over the last 40-50 years in particular, we’ve noticed a pulling apart of these two identities. So that the differences between being a “good Christian” and being a “good Australian” have become more noticeable.

So, with that quick recap, WHAT kind of persecuted life ought we to expect as 21st-century Australians?

If we go back to Open Doors’ categories, we can notice the differences. We can continue to praise God that at this point in history, eight of the nine categories of persecution are not characteristic of Australia, largely due to our Western heritage.

Christians in Australia are not facing Islamic Oppression, Religious Nationalism, Clan Oppression, Ethno-Religious Hostility, Christian Denominational Protectionism, Communist and Post-Communist Oppression, Dictatorial Paranoia, or Organised Corruption & Crime. That’s not to say those things will never happen in Australia, but none of them are characteristic of the Australian Christian experience in the way they are in other countries that we mentioned earlier.

The ninth category, Secular Intolerance, is defined by Open Doors as seeking to “eradicate Christian expression from public life and impose atheistic secularism” and is something which we have noticed an increase in in recent years.

Three quick high-profile examples.

There was the case of Andrew Thorburn, who was appointed the chief executive of the Essendon AFL Club, who was forced to resign a day later because the church he belonged to believed and taught the orthodox, historical Christian ethic on marriage and sexuality.

There was the Catholic Hospital in the ACT, taken over by the state, in part (not in whole), because they practised orthodox, historic Christian ethics on in utero life and end-of-life care.

And there’s the unanswered question about religious freedom for Christian schools and organisations that hold to orthodox, historical Christian teachings, and whether they will be allowed to restrict their hiring practices to those who affirm these same beliefs.

None of this is to equate Jemal’s fear that his persecutors would kill his children with Andrew Thorburn missing out on an estimated half-billion-dollar-per-year salary with the Essendon football club. These are not the same thing.

Neither is a Christian school’s freedom to hire according to theological convictions the same as that of our Chinese brothers and sisters, who lack the freedom to gather publicly for church without fear of their ministers and elders being “disappeared” by the government.

At the same time, it’s also not, not the same thing… Again, using Open Doors’ categories, whether it’s Islamic Oppression, Christian Denominational Protectionism or Secular Intolerance, Jesus is affirming for us here the common lived experience of Christians throughout time and across the globe: “If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first.”

What kind of persecution might we expect to face in Sydney at this moment in history? It will likely be the form that seeks to “eradicate Christian expression from public life”. We might feel this in our workplaces, our schools, our friendship groups or our communities.

SO WHAT?

Finally, SO WHAT?

What are we to do with this information? How do we live the abiding life when “the vine grows in a harsh landscape”?

I want to first look at some impossible applications.2

Impossible Application #1: Jesus has lost control.

This is clearly not the case. John is at pains to point out to us, as Jesus did to his disciples, that Jesus is always fully, and ultimately, in control, regardless of the circumstances we find ourselves in. This is the meaning of the warning he gives,

I have told you this, so that when their time comes you will remember that I warned you about them.

John 16:4

Impossible Application #2: Jesus is not worth following.

Jesus knows that this is a possibility. Throughout his ministry, there have been those who followed him for a time, but then turned away (e.g., Jn. 6:66). At the beginning of this series of teachings, Judas, one of his own disciples, has left the house in order to betray Jesus to the Jewish leadership.

Jesus wants to guard the remaining disciples against the same danger. Forewarned is forearmed. And he warns the disciples,

All this I have told you so that you will not fall away.

John 16:1

Impossible Application #3: Fight back

I don’t know what kind of Christian media comes across your feed, but I see several Christian influencers and commentators whose rhetoric is characterised by hatred, discord, rage and anger against the secular world, selfish ambition (“like and subscribe”), and dissensions and factions. The only thing that makes a Christian influencer angrier than the secular world is other Christians with whom they disagree theologically, politically or culturally.

Do you know where these values all turn up in Scripture? In Paul’s list of “acts of the flesh.”

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Galatians 5:19-21

Fighting back against secular intolerance with your own anger, bitterness, rage and factions, is not the way of Christ. And if these are the characteristics of the content that comes across your feed, then you need to turn it off and find other voices to listen to.

Necessary Applications

So if these are the impossible applications, what are the necessary implications?

Instead of feeling as if Jesus has lost control, be comforted, Jesus is still with you.

Instead of wondering if Jesus is worth following, keep following, because life with Jesus is worth it.

Instead of fighting back, speak the truth in love.

‘When the Advocate comes, whom I will send to you from the Father – the Spirit of truth who goes out from the Father – he will testify about me. And you also must testify, for you have been with me from the beginning.

John 15:26-27

The application then for the disciples was the ongoing confirmation from these chapters that the Holy Spirit, the Advocate, the Spirit of Truth, would come and be with them and both testify Himself about the truth of Jesus, and give the disciples the confidence to testify to the truth of Jesus as well.

And this will in part be the application for us. That as we abide in Jesus, as we soak in him, marinating in him, becoming more and more like him in our thoughts, our actions, our desires, our virtues, our values and our practices—in the midst of a world that may hate us and persecute us—that we will be able to testify to the truth of Jesus.

And how do we do this? Well, we can once again go back to the words of Peter, who was in that upper room on the night Jesus taught his disciples, and then later wrote this letter to the churches.

In your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behaviour in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.

1 Peter 3:15-16

Not with hatred, anger, dissensions or factions, but love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self-control.

What does a life abiding in Christ look like?

As we saw last week, and have been reminded of this morning, it’s a life of deep communion with Jesus. Wanting to soak in him like a celery stick in coloured water, to become more and more like him because of how much time and energy and attention we are giving to him and letting him influence our thoughts, our words, our actions.

It’s a life of obedience to Jesus. “If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love.”

And what is this command? There’s lots in the Bible, but the immediate context tells us that Jesus’ main concern is that we love one another.

A life of loving Jesus and loving each other. But be prepared. The more we become like Jesus, the less we become like the world. And the less we become like the world, the more friction we should expect in living in this world. A life characterised by the fruit of the Spirit, because of a commitment to King Jesus, runs counter to the world’s commitments.

Let’s finish with Jemal’s story.

Remember her said, “My greatest fear was that they would kill my children. I was overwhelmed and paralysed. Still the feeling of that moment remains with me.”

The story goes on…

They eventually all found each other and took shelter with 136 displaced families on the compound of a welcoming church. But the ordeal had done its damage.

“I temporarily lost the taste of walking with God,” Jemal says honestly. “I felt like taking revenge on them.”

When Open Doors heard of the violence, they responded immediately with emergency relief. Thanks to supporters like you, Jemal received food supplies, trauma care, and new machinery and raw materials to restart his businesses.

“We might have been subjected to selling the land. This ministry helped us to stand on our feet. May God bless you all!”

And through it all, something unexpected happened.

“Through all of this my faith has grown stronger. It has not weakened,” he reflects. “My affection for God has increased considerably.”

The vine grows in a harsh landscape, but friends, do not be afraid. John 16:4 again “I have told you this, so that when their time comes you will remember that I warned you about them.” Jesus is still on his throne. You are still saved, still forgiven, still washed, still clean. You are his. Keep abiding in Jesus.

Half of kids surveyed say their parents should be worried about their screen time. Technology is now the number one reason children say they fight with their parents. And perhaps most tellingly, 62% of kids say they wish they could take their parents’ phones away.

We began by talking about Wes Huff’s recent appearance on Diary of a CEO. It’s a fascinating example of someone communicating the gospel in a way that resonates with a generation that seems genuinely curious about Jesus again.

From there, we worked through Jonathan Haidt’s After Babel Substack piece, “30 Facts About Childhood Today” [EDIT: the article has since been retracted]1. Some of the statistics are sobering — particularly the growing number of children who have no siblings or cousins — and it led us to think about what the church might uniquely offer in response.

Joel and I are both preaching from John 15:18–16:4 this weekend, where Jesus prepares his disciples for the reality that the world will hate them. One observation from our conversation stuck with me: the order matters. The world should hate us because they hate Jesus, not hate Jesus because they hate us. When Christians behave badly — hypocritically, arrogantly, or weaponising faith — people often reject Jesus because they first reject us. That reversal is worth sitting with.

We also drifted into some “behind the scenes” preaching talk: how sermons actually get put together, the difference between teaching and preaching, and the strange experience of discovering that sometimes the sermons you felt least prepared for are the ones the Spirit seems to use the most.

My encouragement this week is simple: go and listen to Joel’s sermon on the passage. It’s already up on YouTube and the podcast feed — and I’d love to hear what you think of it.

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Check out the full conversation in the links below or on your favourite podcast app.

1

After we recorded this episode, After Babel withdrew the article due to some inaccuracies in the reporting. Since I don’t know which parts of the article were problematic, perhaps take our discussion on these topics with a grain of salt.

After Babel

A Note on a Correction from Jon and Zach

Note (March 17, 2026): After recognizing that the guest post titled “30 Facts About Childhood Today that Will Terrify You” included inaccuracies, we made the decision to remove it from our Substack…

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2 months ago · 699 likes · 99 comments

We’d love you to consider joining.

The Shock Absorber Network is:

• Relational without being competitive

• Theological and not merely pragmatic

• Collaborative rather than territorial

• Intergenerational by design

• Grounded in friendship with Jesus and with each other (John 15:15)

The Shock Absorber Network is not:

• A breakaway movement

• A critique platform

• A program franchise

• A brand expansion of Soul Revival Church

• A replacement for the institutions and organisations with which it works alongside

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Ministry networks are an effective, but far too often under-utilised, tool in the Christian worker’s toolbox. As Mikey Lynch writes in TGC Australia,

“All sorts of new opportunities and benefits open up when networks bridge across organisations, businesses, different social demographics, geographic areas and denominations. Networking builds efficiency and effectiveness in our ministry efforts, and it can circumvent conflict and waste.”

’s PhD on new social movement theories and his 35 years of experience leading Soul Revival have continued to affirm the importance of bringing together like-minded individuals to share the joys and challenges of ministry.

Many of you may have denominational or local networks that support you in your role. Praise God! Maintain those relationships, and may God continue to bless your endeavours and others’ through the support structures that they provide.

However, for those of you who are looking for friendship and support in your ministry—whether that be children’s and/or youth ministry, church planting, church revitalisation, or “other”—we invite you to consider whether The Shock Absorber Network may be a place for you to contribute and collaborate in significant ways.

To hear the full announcement with plenty more details on the theology, strategy and practice of networking, listen along to the podcast episode in the links below, or on your favourite podcasting app.

And to express interest in joining The Shock Absorber Network, head to The Shock Absorber website and fill in the form towards the bottom of the page.

Hunter and I have spent the last two episodes considering how best to recruit and train volunteers in your Children’s Ministry. This week, we move to how we can best care for the team of volunteers who serve our youngest brothers and sisters.

From low-key relational moments to more structured times of appreciation and equipping, showing leaders that you notice their work and verbally affirming their ministry goes a long way toward helping them sustain ministry in the long term.

Top tip from Hunter: talk to your church elders and add a “leader appreciation” line to the church budget.

This might be a minimum cost potluck lunch, or gifting each member a book to read over their summer break. Whatever the scale of your ministry and budget, having some cost value goes some way to indicate the spiritual value that your leaders are bringing to the lives of the children they serve.

Listen to the full episode in the link below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Shock Absorber Podcast - With Or Against the Grain

Should Christian influencers chase the algorithm? Is Christian influencer an oxymoron? Should Christians be using social media platforms at all?

and I take at look at our thumbnails and tackle this topic head on on this week’s Shock Absorber.

We kick off with the history of Spanish football and the long-term rivalry between Real Madrid vs Barcelona, which (somehow 🤷‍♂️) ends up with a biblical framework for thinking about metrics of success in a world that rewards inflammatory, clickbaity and often dishonest content.

I attempt a brief biblical theology of communication, from the cultural mandate of Genesis 1-2, through the wisdom of Proverbs, and out the other side of Jesus’ death and resurrection, arguing that what is good, true and beautiful will *often* produce pro-social results, with an important caveat that the wisdom of God can also be seen as folly by the watching world.

Here’s the challenge I give myself: my intention may be to be creative and redemptive on social media, but how do I recognise when social media has evangelised me instead?

Listen to the full episode in the link below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Title: Sustainable Children’s Ministry: From Last-Minute Scrambling to Long-Term Solutions
Author: Mark DeVries & Annette Safstrom
Published: IVP, 2018

Welcome to the first review in this new series, where I read through Children’s Ministry books and tell you what I think. Together, we’ll explore the theology, strategy and practice of children’s, family, and intergenerational ministry through the extensive literature in each of these fields, not to mention all the sub-disciplines and adjacent conversations like developmental studies, child spirituality, Christian education, and anything else that piques my interest.

I thought that I would kick off with one of my favourite children’s ministry books, Mark De Vries and Annette Safstrom’s, Sustainable Children’s Ministry. Thinking in terms of our theology, strategy, and practice paradigm, this book is firmly in the strategy leading to practice camp. There are few theological commitments, next to no Bible references, and no intentional exegesis.

What makes Sustainable Children’s Ministry special is its clear self-understanding as a strategy book with tons of practical examples, systems and handouts that Kidmin leaders can implement in their ministry straight away.

The reason that it is one of my favourite children’s ministry books is that it strengthens one of my personal weaknesses: systems that facilitate effective ministry.

If you’ve followed my writing or podcasts for some time, you’ve likely noticed my love for the theology and foundational philosophy of children’s ministry. This is my happy place. I even wrote a book about it.

When it comes to ministry practice, I’m most comfortable sitting one-on-one or with a small group of children and simply reading the Bible together and chatting about it.

Somewhere in between Kidmin theology and in-the-moment reading the Bible with kids, is my personal weak spot; building the sustainable systems that lead to long-term health of me and my ministry. Sustainable Children’s Ministry is one book I return to regularly to remind myself of the kinds of systems and structures I should be building to equip my leaders, partner with families, and champion children’s ministry in my church context.

The Big Idea

Children’s Ministry is a resource-heavy ministry. Volunteers, pastoral needs, administration, and all the accumulated craft and activity “stuff” that goes along with running a ministry for little humans. Sustainable Children’s Ministry is all about systems—what Safstrom calls “simple machines”—that enable the ministry worker to nourish rather than flounder in their role.

Here’s one key quote that summarises the heart of the book:

“Flash and fizz are fun and can be very effective at attracting young families, at least one time. But without sustainable systems beneath the unforgettable moments, the impact is almost always short lived.” (p.5)

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Key Chapters

Each chapter provides a clear and concise concept that outlines the strategy of each system, and provides practical tips for implementing these simple machines into your ministry. The beauty is that each system really is simple. While the cumulative effect of putting all the ideas into practice at once would be overwhelming, each system is self-contained. This allows each of us to pick one or two we want to prioritise in the short term, and refer back to other chapters in the future.

Here are a couple of chapters and key quotes that I’ve found most helpful in my ministry:

Chapter 2 - The Workhorse Syndrome

This early chapter describes the experience of many children’s ministry leaders who move from joy in the ministry to near-burnout.

“It doesn’t take long before, a few years into our professional children’s ministry careers, the grind of expanding expectations becomes, well, a grind… Before long, our passion has subtly turned into willingness. Willingness becomes obligation. Obligation turns to chronic exhaustion, until the once-passionate children’s ministers find themselves increasingly frustrated, frayed, and defensive… They come to believe that the greatness of the need obligates them to hang in there, even though it’s been a long time since anything about the work made their hearts sing.” (pp.21-22)

I pray that this doesn’t describe you. Though I’ll admit, I’ve had some of these moments myself. However, if this is you, you will find this chapter an encouraging introduction to the more structured and systemised ministry that comes from following the tips and tricks of later chapters.

Chapter 5 - Building Your Ministry With Simple Machines

This is the first chapter that digs deep into the systems that enable sustainable ministry, focusing on the key areas of databases, calendars and recruitment. I appreciate that even in implementing systems, Safstrom’s heart is always with the child, not the system as an end to itself.

With regards to databases, Safstrom writes,

“There are few things that will affect the long-term stability of your ministry more than knowing your flock in this very deliberate way.” (p.58)

Chapter 8 - The Delegation Dance

Theologically, it is the role of the apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors and teachers “to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ.” (Ephesians 4:11-12) Effective recruiting, training, and equipping of volunteers is essential to any sustainable children’s ministry. Therefore, it is no surprise that this topic appears in several chapters.

I appreciate this chapter on raising the vision of the ministry worker to the amplification effect of engaging others well in ministry.

“What would happen if we structured our ministry in a way that our primary job is not doing the world of ministry but equipping others to do it?” (p.98)

Chapter 12 - More Than Planning

This chapter describes the importance of working, not just in the ministry day-by-day and week-by-week, but working on the ministry. Safstrom introduces the concept of “balcony time,” intentionally stepping back from the hustle and engaging in the kind of strategic reading, thinking, and praying that will support sustainable ministry.

“In “the balcony,” you take a step back from this week’s or this month’s tasks and look at the big picture of the ministry from a higher level. This is time for you to invest in the future of the ministry by strategising, refining processes and planning for the next few months or the next year.” (p.161)

Taking time to “read our way into better children’s ministry” is one specific example of giving yourself to balcony time.

Nit-Picky

No book is perfect, not even one of my favourites. Here are a few pernickety comments to keep in mind.

Context & Theology

I’ve already acknowledged that the book is not attempting to construct a theology of children’s ministry, but that does not mean that there is not an implicit theology coming through the pages. After reflecting on some of the strategies or phrasing that struck me as strange or did not fit my context, I realised it was our definition of church that was misaligned.

While the authors do not advocate any particular denomination or theological heritage, the book feels as if it is written primarily with non-denominational evangelicalism in mind, particularly that of a seeker-sensitive flavour. While I largely agree that the strategies suggested will scale with the size of the church, the language used throughout implies a large children’s ministry with a multi-person staff team, impersonal relationships with the congregation and team members, and a high emphasis on events.

My own church context is complex. We are evangelical, but Anglican. We take our theological heritage seriously, but with a low-church expression. Even within our Diocese, our church’s strategic distinctives emphasise a small-church community and intergenerationality. For us, the gathering of God’s people around God’s word is the focal point, from which extends our commitment to preaching, sacraments, discipleship, mission and third-place community.

Sustainable Children’s Ministry assumes a different structure and priorities for Sunday ministries, mid-week and special events, which may not completely fit those of more liturgical or community-oriented churches.

Thanks for reading the first instalment of Growing Disciples: Book by Book. If you have suggestions for future books worth reviewing, please leave a comment below.

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This week on The Shock Absorber, and I chat about what it means to live a life of loyalty to Jesus.

Along the way, we discuss:

• Whether Bluey is the most conservative show on TV.

• Why Richard Dawkins, amongst others, consider themselves cultural Christians.

• What truth there is in Robert Greene’s claim that religion's purpose is to help you transcend the banality of social media.

In the end, we consider the significant difference between people finding value in religion and people finding Jesus, using Skye Jethani’s definition of With.

Watch or listen to the full episode in the links below or on your favourite podcasting app.

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Cross Formed Kidmin Podcast - Training Volunteers

This week on The Cross Formed Kidmin podcast, Hunter and I follow up on last week’s conversation about recruiting leaders, and discuss how to onboard and train leaders for longterm effectiveness.

From Safe Ministry training and police checks through to vision setting and knowing where the scissors are kept, this episode will help you think carefully about how best to train the leaders you are recruiting into your ministry.

Listen to the full conversation in the link below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Have you got a question about Children’s Ministry that you would like us to cover on the Cross Formed Kidmin podcast. Leave a comment below.

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Most churches are good at two things: the big Sunday gathering and the small group. However, our intrepid co-host on The Shock Absorber podcast, , has emerged from a summer of PhD research and writing to share with me and about the missing layer of friendship that makes the structured events of our church life together work well.

In this episode, we explored Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s theology of friendship as something far more than a sentimental extra. Stu’s dives into Bonhoeffer’s concentric circles (the 3, the 12, the 72, the 120), I share about my reading of Joseph Hellerman’s work on sibling language in the early church, and Joel throws in for good measure the oft-cited Dunbar Number. When you throw all of these into the mix, we found something fascinating: biology and theology agree. Humans are built for layered friendship.

The church should be the one place where all those layers exist — not just the crowd and the clique, but the medium-sized missional community we’ve quietly allowed to disappear. And it left me with a simple but confronting question: what would actually change this Sunday if we genuinely called the people at church our friends?

Watch or listen to the full episode in the links below or on your favourite podcasting app.

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Cross Formed KidMin Podcast - Recruitment

This week is the first half of a conversation that Hunter and I had about recruiting leaders in Children’s Ministry. At Soul Revival Church, we value low-key, long-term, relational discipleship, but we also take seriously the Apostle James’ instruction that “not many of you should become teachers”. How do we balance the relaxed vibes of our church culture with the high bar of leadership set in Scripture?

That’s one tension that Hunter and I chat about as we discuss recruitment strategies in our different context.

Listen to the full conversation in the link below or on your favourite podcasting app.

Have you got a question about Children’s Ministry that you would like us to cover on the Cross Formed Kidmin podcast. Leave a comment below.

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Have you ever tried searching for stock images of “family”? Every picture is the perfect, Instagrammable family, presenting well but hiding the chaos that happens in every home. You and I know that this is not the reality. Yet the parents in our churches can feel the pressure, not only to present as Pinterest-worthy in their public life, but then to sit at home anxiously wondering what they are doing wrong when their experience resembles The Simpsons more than Bluey.

Good thing that there are quick and easy answers you’ll get by listening to these podcasts and buying my short course online.

Ok… that was facetious.

The complex answer involves walking alongside families as they do this messy thing called “life”, providing them with the pastoring, shepherding and community that they need. In my church, we say that all ministry is long-term, low-key and relational. Or, to quote Eugene Peterson, Family Ministry, like all discipleship, is a long obedience in the same direction.

To different extents, both podcasts this week address this topic. Here’s what you can expect to hear.

Cross Formed Kidmin Podcast

As a children’s or youth minister in a church, pastoring families in your congregation is an essential part of your role because the household is an essential sphere of discipleship. On this week’s episode, Hunter, Ryan and I tackle the topic of Family Ministry head-on and come up with the three C’s of Family Ministry.

Communicate

Child discipleship is a partnership between church and home. The greater the alignment between these two worlds, the greater the impact on the child’s faith formation. You want the parents in your church to know what you are doing, what you are teaching, and how you are fostering faith in their children.

QUESTION: How do you communicate with your parents to let them know what’s going on in the children’s ministry?

Contact

If child discipleship is a partnership, then Family Ministry is not just about telling families what you are doing, but hearing from them about what they’re doing. How are they going? What are the joys and challenges of family life? How can you pray for them? How can you resource them for the ministry that only they can do?

QUESTION: How do you hear from your parents to find out what’s going on in their family life?

Coach

Alongside the regular rhythms of ministry, there will be times to particularly equip families with the skills, conversations and resources they need to disciple their children at home. Running seminars, suggesting reading and listening material, or facilitating co-learning spaces for parents may be some ways to coach the parents in your church for their life of faith.

QUESTION: What do your parents need to parent well, and how can you facilitate this equipping?

Check out the full conversation here or in your favourite podcasting app.

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The Shock Absorber Podcast

As promised, the first episode for 2026 came out this week with and I touching on a range of subjects. Joel shares about his summer holiday project and rearranging his kids rooms, which leads us to talk about the difference between Authoritative vs. Authoritarian parenting, the right use of authority and power, and why it is important for children to hear their parent’s ask for forgiveness.

We also talk about Cambridge Dictionary’s word for the year (“parasocial”), why we’re drawn to parasocial relationships with celebrities and AI Chat-bots, and, by contrast, what an “abiding” relationship with Jesus looks like.

Check out the full conversations in the links below.

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